Sorry that I didn't blog last night, but sometimes it is just too painful. Jeremy drove her to class and she did OK until about 8:30. Then she was very sick and achey. She had a rough night with nausea and vomiting. But, she did say that she slept until noon and had a few hours of good rest. Then rough again this afternoon.

She did say that her professors were very understanding and said that they will do what it takes to help her. Hopefully she will be able to get through most of the classes and enjoy them. She really needs the distraction right now.

She keeps saying that she doesn't know how she can do this for 4 more months (or longer, but I can't even think about that). I am just praying that she won't have to go through radiation once she is through with the chemo.

Kelsie said that she can't wait until Carli is on campus...please pray that Carli will be ready to return to GCC in January. She really needs that to look forward to! She refuses to even think about being gone for a whole year. As her mom I have to be ready for the possibility that the cure will take longer than we would like. It already has!! Plus, I keep praying that the chemo doesn't cause any long-term side effects. We really need your prayers!!

Again, thanks to all who are supporting us in a variety of ways...every one of you is so appreciated!!!!!!

Disappointing day...Carli did not get the news that she wanted. Too bad that is the way life is...but I have to keep trusting that God is in control, because if He wasn't, this would be really hard to take.

Her tumors are not gone, but they are shrinking. She still has one in her chest, so they are going to do 4 more treatments (counting the one today) and then do another CT. Best case scenario is that she will only have 4 more after that. So that brings us to December sometime. She was hoping to be done in October, but that is not to be.

She was very sick with her treatment today, and I think that part was probably that she had just gotten the news from Dr. Stallings. She always feels terrible when they give her the "red devil", and today it was especially bad. She was trying to sleep, and we thought that she was, and as soon as Debbie started the med, she was instantly sick, and she didn't even have her eyes open! She is that sensitive to it. They gave her extra IV Ativan, and that helped some. She immediately went to bed when she got home.

She is determined to start classes tomorrow evening. She has a World Civ-Middle East class, a World-Civ China class, and Developmental Psych. Sounds like a lot to me, but she has a couple of weeks if she needs to drop. She is going to try to catch the profs tomorrow night, explain her situation, and go from there. I have friends that live nearby, or I will get caught up on my reading, as she will need me to drive her!

Thanks again for all of your prayers. We can't let up now...the weeks and months ahead are going to be some of the toughest.

Carli is back home after having a good time reconnecting with her friends at GCC. The girls that were on her hall last year made her a really neat scrapbook, full of pictures, scripture, and well wishes. I guess that Kelsie is also having a great time with the orientation activities.

Please pray for us tonight and tomorrow as we should get the results of the CT, and then she will get her chemo. That's a lot to handle in one day. Then on Tuesday evening she starts classes at Wayne. I am not sure how she is going to do this, and she will need a driver (me), but she is determined. I think that she might be trying too much, but we will see. I want her to do whatever it takes to feel as normal as she can.

Carli drove home today from Michigan, then went to Wayne College and registered for classes. She can't take everything that she would like, but is taking some classes that she thinks that she will enjoy that will be OK for her electives. (Which of course was possible because Ted and I ran around like crazy people at Grove City yesterday getting her transcript, turning in her computer, etc etc etc). Kelsie is settled in and has a real nice roommate. Hopefully she will make new friends and enjoy college life. Ted and I had dinner with Jane and Craig, which is always a treat.

Carli said tonight that this is the only time in her life that she gets to be the only child! She decided that it is fun for now, but by the end of the year she will probably be pretty tired of being home with the parents. We'll see....

She is driving out to Grove City tomorrow to see her classmates/friends before they are swamped with classes. She is taking out some odds and ends that Kelsie needs, so that wll be nice. She can make sure that Kelsie is on the right track!

Today a good friend from high school stopped by to see Carli. She loves to get visitors when she is feeling well.

It will really be quiet without Kelsie around. The dog is already forlorn.

No news is good news....

We take Kelsie to Grove City College tomorrow...

She is taking Jeremy back home today...mom worries when she's gone. I guess that I have to get over that! Ted and I have some little "jobs" to do for her at Grove City when we take Kelsie on Thursday, like pick up her transcript so that she can "transfer" to Wayne. Bureaucracy....at it's finest. Ha. She said that she isn't letting any of this bother her, wish I could be so calm. But, it will all go away when she returns for spring semester, I hope!

Still having problems feeling bloated and feeling large. Today she was the funny one, however. I was checking out her head (which is soft and fuzzy) and she said that she feels like a cabbage patch doll! The ones that the girls had when they were little were usually bald...but I thought that they were cute! I think that she looks cute enough to go without a scarf, but she isn't that brave yet.

Two more friends from camp are here and they are all going to a concert tomorrow night. I am glad that she feels up to it. Although, I think that she would go if she had to crawl!

I start back to school tomorrow, which makes me a little anxious. It will be good for Carli not to have me around so much, I guess! Hopefully she will make some more calls tomorrow and get her schedule at Wayne College figured out. One more hurdle to jump over.........

She couldn't drink any more, but they did go ahead with the CT. I am not sure when we will get results.

She felt fairly good today. Still bloated, but not quite so achey. Although she did say that she couldn't sleep last night and vomited 4 times. The CT contrast just isn't her thing.

We had a nice lunch, Jeremy and grandpa were here. Then we spent the afternoon outside. She didn't do much but observe, but had a good time anyway.

Tonight we are taking her and Jeremy to Taggerts-a great little old fashioned ice cream place. There is nothing that ice cream won't fix, right? Add lots of chocolate....

Yesterday was no fun for Carli. She had to start drinking her prep for the CT. Being already nauseated, she couldn't drink it. She took a Phenergan first, but it really didn't help much. She couldn't drink it all, and the doctor said that they can still do it, it just might not show things as well. So, today is going to be a coaching session for me to try to get her to drink the rest. She has some more meds that she can take today, so hopefully that will help.

Please pray for her today. Not only that she can drink the prep liquids on time, but that she has peace about whatever the CT will show.

Typical day #2. Jeremy took her for her Neulasta shot and then they went out for lunch. I was glad that she felt good enough to be out of bed that long! Tonight is when it gets tough...lots of aching and bloating. Doesn't sound very pleasant, does it? It is good for her to be distracted...better than when she is just here with good ole mom and dad. She did remind us today, though, that we really won't be empty nesters this fall, like we thought we would. Always the funny girl...ha!

Not the worst day, not the best. She slept a lot during the chemo, and then got really sick as we were leaving. She slept most of the afternoon. Thanks to Diann, we had Kidron Chicken BBQ for dinner, and Kathy made peach cobbler. I thank God for our friends and family, I don't know where we would be without them.

Carli's CT is scheduled for Friday afternoon. She is already fretting about drinking the contrast. It is terrible, and when you are already queezy it sounds impossible. Dr. Stallings gave her a medication to take that should help with the nausea and nerves. Hopefully it will help, or she will be unable to have the CT if she can't drink the contrast. I would think that the only thing left to do would be to insert an NG tube, and that wouldn't be very fun, either. Tara said that she would be glad to come and insert one, as she has only practiced so far on the mannikins at school. Needless to say, Carli was not interested in having her sister practice her skills on her!! Who can blame her?

I start back to school this week and am really dreading it. I just pray that Carli's chemo stays on schedule and that goes smoothly from here out. My job share buddy is great and has done a lot to get us ready to go, and for that I am grateful. Carli still hasn't done everything that she needs to do to get her classes OK'd from GCC...she operates on a different wave length than her mother. What 21 year old doesn't????

Chemo Week #8

How do these weeks go so fast? Seems like chemo week happens more often than "regular" weeks.
Carli came home this evening and we all (Ted and I, Kelsie, Tara, Carli and Jeremy) went out to dinner. It was so nice to sit and eat and talk and laugh. Poor Kelsie...we had some fun at her expense...the youngest sometimes gets picked on! Carli had a great week at camp and said that the little kids were so much fun.

Carli is dreading tomorrow. Each week almost seems to get more difficult. We will be asking the doctor tomorrow what the plans are to check and see how the chemo is doing. If I understood correctly, she will have a CT this month to see if we are making progress. She is determined that she will only have 4 more treatments. The hard part will be drinking the stuff for the CT. She could hardly get it down in April, and now with a queezy stomach she is worried she won't be able to keep it down. Pray that there will be an alternative.....

Jeremy is here to see what she really goes through. Carli said that she hasn't shown him her head yet...I think that it is bothering her more than she ever lets on. She wears a bandana or scarf and has received some cute hats from a good friend (thanks, Sandy!). People are still so thoughtful and praying for her...it is such a blessing.

The registrar called on Wednesday evening. He was very nice and explained the situation that Carli is in. GCC has to report all students to a national clearninghouse. I believe that this is a result of 9/11 and it is something that they have to do. He said that her withdrawel is mainly just a reporting/paperwork kind of thing. She can't have her roommate, because they have 45 students right now on stand-by for a room this fall!! But, by January there should be no problem as they have students that will graduate in December.

He said that she will come back with senior status and be able to register with her class. Thank goodness, because she can't take the chance of being closed out of any classes, etc. The only battles left to fight (I think) are for her computer and her email. He is checking into those issues for us.

He was very nice and explained everything well. He also said that he was hearing how many people are so disappointed that she isn't returning this fall. It is also nice to speak to the powers that be and know that they are also praying for your daughter!!

So, right now we only have the computer and email issues. And, in the scheme of things, they are small issues compared to everything else. I felt a lot better after getting off of the phone with Dr. Inman and realizing why they have to do what they do.

Carli called yesterday and is having a great time with the little inner city kids. She said that it was HOT and humid at camp, too, and rainy. But, they were still having fun. Some of these kids have never been swimming or out in a woods. She said that they are so funny to watch! I'm sure that she will have stories to tell!!! She will be home on Monday as the camp staff are going to the dunes on Sunday. Hopefully her counts will be good enough to have chemo on Tuesday.....

I can't help but crying as I read the last post. Carli and Brett look so cute, but you can imagine what was going on inside their heads.

Now today she says that Grove City says that she has to withdraw in order to take classes at Wayne. That would mean that she has to return her computer, discontinue her email, give up her ID, and not have senior privileges when she returns, hopefully in January. I think that Ted and I are in for a fight with the powers that be at GCC. She also cannot room with her friend, Rachel, when she returns, as they are giving up her room to someone else.

I can understand policy, but Carli isn't a typical student with a typical problem. Please pray for us as we try to work with the college. This really gets to me considering that Carli was a RA last year (and was going to be one this year) and Kelsie is going to be a student there, too. Plus, Tara is a successful alumni. Not like we haven't contributed to the school!!!!!

Talked with Carli this afternoon-she is still coughing. Pray for healing...and for no sunburns on her head :)

Carli and Brett are true cousins! They both went under the blade and both look adorable. Carli did leave for camp after this fiasco. She is still coughing but is feeling better today. This is her last week at Friedenswald with the inner city kids. Should be fun and hot! As her mom, I worry that she won't drink enough, takes her medicine, sleep, etc etc etc. It is so hard to let her go.

Buzzing her head was definitely one of the hardest things that I have had to do in a long time. She was ready, but she still longs for her beautiful tresses. Kelsie was quiet...Brett's mom and dad (Dan and Lori-my sister) and cousin Kaylie were here, too. Dan finished the job as he is the pro with the trimmers. When these two were little and riding in the cabin of the boat, who would've thought that they would be going through THIS together????

Carli says that she feels"chemical" today. She says that she hates how she feels, especially when she can't do anything about it. She did feel good enough this afternoon to go to the Dari-Ette with a friend who now lives in Virginia. They had a great time.

Ted and I went to Alec's memorial service in Shanksville, PA. I didn't realize that he was only 16 1/2. But, for a young man, he sure left his mark on the world. What a witness to God's love, grace and power to work through even the toughest situations. It was nice to meet his parents...what strength they exhibited. Even though it was such a sad time for them, when I talked with his Mom she was so focused on our situation with Carli. Wow.

Carli hopes to feel well enough to head for camp tomorrow afternoon......after shaving her head and her cousin Brett shaving his, too! I'll let you know how that goes!

Neulasta Day

Carli slept in today and Kelsie took her to get her Neulasta injection (I think that I have the flu...sympathy pain for Carli!!). They didn't give her fluids and meds again today because accessing her port makes her sick. So, as long as she isn't vomiting, they omit that part. The injection really stings, though, and she dreads how it makes her feel. Tonight she hurts all over, her joints ache, and her abdomen is bloated. No fun.

Tara came home today...Todd is with a friend this weekend for some bachelor fun before his wedding (nothing too racey...playing golf-at least that what he tells us !) So, she was able to help this evening as Carli and I are both down for the count.

Guess Carli wants to borrow Lori's clippers and cut off the rest of her hair...maybe tomorrow? I'll keep you posted! She still looks cute in her bandanas, but getting rid of the rest of it will be tough.

Chemo Day

She did get her chemo today. She had a particularly rough time today, though. I don't know if it was because she wasn't feeling well to start with, or if her mind was really playing games with her. She took her meds and tried to sleep, but she was very fidgety and just couldn't relax. Today was the first time that she verbalized being very sick and tired of getting chemo. She did eat a little bit tonight and I hope that she can drink enough that she won't need fluids tomorrow. That keeps them from having to access her port, which in turn makes her nauseated and she sometimes vomits. If she feels half decent, they will only give her the Neulasta injection.

Her hair is very sparse, and she thinks that she will shave her head before she goes back to camp. She doesn't want anyone to see her head-she said that is one thing that she will be very private about. Today she said that the way she looks and feels is the worst thing about this whole ordeal. She doesn't feel well enough to exercise, and she feels like her body is turning to mush! We are praying that this is only temorary, and that by this time next year she will be back to her old self!!!

Carli was actually feeling better this afternoon and evening, still had a terrible cough, but wasn't achey. She and Ted went to see the Harry Potter movie. Jeremy came for a quick visit at about 10pm, now she is very nauseated and vomiting. She took some Phenergan and is hoping that it will pass by tomorrow morning. She really wants to get her chemo over with instead of waiting until next week.