The next few days are going to be a blur. Tonight is rehearsals with my choirs at church, then the program and Christmas with my sisters after church which is always fun. Friday morning opening gifts, brunch with the grandparents and Todd's family, then hanging out. Saturday my extended family comes, close to 40 of us, then Sunday Ted's family comes. Whew! When Christmas is on a weekend, it all hits at once !!

Carli and Jeremy are in Michigan. Hope that they are enjoying time with the Braun's. They will return in time for the craziness with the Kohler's!! I would love a white Christmas, but at least it looks good for those who have to travel.

Please keep my friend Lois in your prayers. Cancer is so ugly.

I would like to wish all of my dear friends and family that read this a very blessed Christmas and health and peace in the New Year!!

I am in tears as I write this and I don't quite know if it is the holidays getting the best of me or just shear joy...Carli's chest xray was clear and her blood count was back to normal! Dr. STallings took her off of her iron pills for now and said that he doesn't think that she will need another chest scan of any kind until June!! And then he thinks he will just do a Chest X-ray and not a CT scan. She was so happy when she called. She absolutely hates the CT scans because of the prep that she has to drink (the "nasty"), so every time that she doesn't have to drink that stuff she is so thankful.

I am so thankful for continued healing for her so that she can continue to get on with a normal 24 year old life. She is now on break from school and said that she was going to spend the rest of the day cleaning b/c their apartment is a disaster! Studying, finals and Jeremy being gone on the road has taken it's toll. Then this weekend she is going to Washington, DC to visit Rachel, and then next week to Michigan for Christmas...she really doesn't have time to deal with any type of illness :) Praise God that she doesn't have to :)

Kelsie is upstairs still trying to unpack and figure out where to put/store things. Quite a task with limited space. And trying to get ready to move back to GCC. She had a great time visiting last week.

Tara and Todd were home over the weekend and all of us, Todd, Tara, Carli, Jeremy, Kelsie, Ted and I went out to dinner Saturday night and then to see the musical "Wicked". We had so much fun! We count every time that all of us are together such a blessing. It was so fun to be crammed in the van, laughing and talking the whole way to and from Cleveland.

Sunday was spent going to church, going to lunch with Carli and Jeremy and then caroling with a fun group from our church. We had 4 year old twins with pink guitars, two ukeleles, guitar, rhythm instruments and lots of willing voices singing to folks from our church and to folks at Glendora Nursing home. We even sang a Hawaiin Christmas song! It was weird to be at Glendora knowing that is where my Dad was supposed to be. But, he is having a much better Christmas in heaven!

Then everyone came back to our house for sloppy joes and hot chocolate. It just is so fun to have families and those of us whose kids are grown coming together and sharing something as simple as caroling. We are so blessed!

Kelsie is home...and isn't feeling well today. I think that it's just a bad cold. I hope that's all it is! She has been pretty good at adjusting, better than I thought. She really liked it in Florence, and misses her friends. They are so fortunate to have Facebook, email, texting, etc. They can stay connected so much better than in the "olden" days.

She was, however, checking flight prices to Florence already today! I told her when she is gainfully employed and can afford it, she is welcome to return. But not on my dollar !! This past semester cost enough!

She is talking little by little about her experiences. I'm sure that she is a changed person after all she did. How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm??? (or even in Ohio?)

Other exciting news...Tara and Todd are "80%" sure that it's a girl!! Mighty exciting considering there haven't been any girls in Todd's family in a very long time. This is gonna be fun...

Carli has an appointment with Dr. Stallings on the 15th...prayers, please. She has finals this week, and finishes for the semester on Thursday, her birthday.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

Cannot believe what all has happened since my last entry. The best part is...we are going to be grandparents!!!! Tara and Todd are expecting on April 16. They are so cute, Tara just felt the baby move, and in a few weeks they are going to find out the sex of the baby. Ted and I as grandparents...whew...it is just hard to fathom...but so exciting.

We have also travelled to Italy to visit Kelsie. Tara, Ted and I spent 10 days traveling to Florence, Rome, and Pisa. We had a great time, saw many interesting things, met Kelsie's friends and saw her apartment and school, met Peter-the professor that she just loves, and walked and walked. It truly is a beautiful country with such deep history. I can't imagine being around buildings that are so beautiful and hundreds of years old every day. Kelsie just loves it, and I know that it will be hard for her to come home. I am thankful that it will be the holidays as it will be easier for her to be here. I think that it will be hard for her to go back to GCC as difficult as it is academically. She is really not looking forward to working so hard after actually getting enough sleep for a semester!!

She comes home on December 4. Pray for safe travels. She has travelled many places in Europe and I have marvelled at how brave she is. I wouldn't be that brave now! Ah, youth! I am sure that she has learned a lot and I am hoping that she can use what she has learned to God's glory.

Our remodeling project in our kitchen is almost complete...just need to touch up some paint and I think that we're about done. I love it. We wonder why we didn't do some of it 17 years ago when we built the house!!

Is so good to have 2 out of 3 girls home for Thanksgiving. Carli and Jeremy came home last night so they wouldn't have to get up so early for the service and sale at church this morning. It is always a good time seeing friends and family and bidding on goodies to help those in need. Then off to grandpa and grandma Gerber's for the traditional feast. It was very yummy and a little more fun this year with the addition of Amber's little girl Kenna.

Tomorrow will be the Kohler gathering here...all 34 of us. My sister-in-law has not been able to be here for Thanksgiving since 1972 as she is a nurse and has always had to work. We are so excited that she can be here! It is always a house full of kids, food and laughter. I especially miss my dad during these family times.......

Fun weekend with Tara and Todd, Carli and Jeremy, and of course, Ted. We went to Buck Creek State Park in Springfield, Ohio. We used to rent a cabin there when the girls were little...my sister Lori and her family, and friends Joan and Randy and family would go, too. We would take motor and sail boats, bikes, fans, toys,skiis, and lots of food and have a grand time. It's amazing how small the cabins look now that we are all adults!! We didn't take any boats or bikes or toys this time b/c the weather was the pits. BUT, we had a good time in spite of it. Gave us an excuse to be lazy and watch the Buckeyes, do some reading...we did get to build a fire and roast hotdogs, make S'mores...so the day wasn't a total bust. Sunday was nice, but chilly. We had a picnic and then had to venture home. Ashi stayed with Tara's dogs at their house...he was very tired when we got home! Coney and Katie just have too much energy for him! The dog sitter said that he was "neurotic"...I agree!

Awaiting news from Kelsie. She had terrible ear pain on the flight to Prague. Then her phone was stolen. That really makes a mom worry...she was traveling alone, and then to have no means of communication...can't wait to hear from her...hopefully later today.

I have started on medication for headaches...if it doesn't work, will have to have a CT or MRI to see if it's something more serious...please pray that it works! I have been having daily headaches that don't always go away with Exedrin...which in the past has been my life-saver. I have to think about my dad and he always said "this getting old isn't for sissies". I'm starting to think that I understand what he meant! Almost a year since he's gone...miss him so much.

Carli loves her new little puppy. Sounds like a good one, too. It's nice that she has company when Jeremy is gone. Now, if Molly could just help her study....!!!!

Susan's heart cath was clear...God is good!

I can't believe that it's been 3 weeks since I've posted...time is flying faster than ever.

Nice weekend with Jeremy's parents. His Dad made them a bookshelf out of some wood from my Dad's farm, and they brought it for the kids. They stayed here, we all went to church this morning, out to lunch at our favorite hole-in-the-wall Smiley's, a little more visiting...nice time. They are fun to be with.

Carli cracked me up this afternoon. She had signed up on the website "The Knot" while she was doing her wedding planning, now they are sending her the magazine "The Nest" since she's married...she said "Just so they don't start sending me 'The Bump'". I laughed so hard...I didn't even realize there was such a thing! What people don't think of...and to think that Kelsie is in marketing and might be thinking along those lines some day...

Please pray for Susan (my sister)...she is having a heart cath this week...I am praying that it will be OK, and that they can figure out the reason for her symptoms.

We are going to visit Kelsie in November!! Can't wait. I really miss her. I really wouldn't have seen her very often if she was at Grove City-I think part of the really missing her is d/t the fact that neither of us can just hop in the car for a visit or a dinner date. She is making plans for what she wants us to see in Florence and the surrounding countryside. Of course, we will need her to give us one of her famous tours of the Duomo!!

I think that she really loves it there. My fear is that she will want to stay...or move there some day. Oh well, you can't stop them from seeing the world! I hope that she is learning many things...good things...

Awareness....

I just read the blog of a little girl who is in remission. Her mom recently put Olivia's brother's photo on their page because he is in military training. This family is going through so much...dad just lost his job, son in military, sister in high school, and olivia is in "remission". Please read this mother's plea for increased awareness for children's cancer...and for prayer for those suffering...and for some sort of "understanding" of God's plan...she so captures in words how I often feel...

http://www.caringbridge.org:80/visit/olivialangwasser

Surprise call!!

What a surprise when I answered my cell today (which I shouldn't have done since I was in the middle of a meeting)....Kelsie!!!!!!!!

She got a cell phone and the call was pretty cheap. Now that she's in Florence her access to the internet is not great. Plus, her friends are in apartments all over the place, so she "needed" texting to communicate with them.

She sounded very good, happy, and said that Florence is "amazing". The food is "too good...I'm going to gain weight", she loves her apartment that she shares with 3 other girls, and she is planning trips to see the sights. She likes her classes-her one art class they go all over the city and sketch and paint...she said that tourists take their photos all the time!! What a hoot. Another class they go all over the city to see buildings and such. She said that it is great.

It sure was the boost that I needed. Work is very stressful right now, and I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Working extra hours (without pay), extra day next week, and can't seem to get done what needs to be done. This time of year is always bad...I just have to keep telling myself that!

I miss my dad....we were out to dinner tonight when a lady my age was with her dad...who was going slow with his walker...and I just wanted Dad to be there, too!

If you haven't checked out Kelsie's blog yet, it is fun. Gerberkj1.blogspot.com

Another reason for thanks....Carli's x-ray was clear! She has another in December. God is faithful...don't let up with the prayers, however!!

Great weekend with Tara and Todd, Carli and Jeremy. So nice to have lots of noise and laughter in the house again. Not to say that Ted and I are boring or anything...

Tara's little dachshund Coney (coney dog, get it?)came home not knowing that she was going under the knife. She was going into heat, and they don't want puppies, so grandpa Ted spayed her late last night. By this morning she was running and jumping like nothing happened. Why can't it be that easy for humans? I would've signed up long ago !!

Carli has her labwork and chest x-ray tomorrow. Please keep praying! Then her appointment with Dr. Stallings is on Tuesday afternoon after she plays with dead people at school. Well, not plays....just cuts and learns....would freak me out, I think. Cadavors are a great way to learn, but a little weird. She said "I see dead people...really". Yikes.

so far she says that it will be hard, especially her biomechanics. Plus, they assume that everyone knows a lot of medical terminology and such. Will be a challenge, but she's been challenged before and done very well.

Talked to Kelsie via Skype this evening. So nice to see her and hear her voice. What did we do before all of this technology? I say that we had more time to do important things but now we sit at the computer...oh well, a sign of the times which has it's positives and negatives. Kelsie sounds like she's having a good time, and there were kids talking and laughing in the background. She's still at the beach this week with the Italian lessons, then on to Florence this coming weekend.

Saying goodbye

Bittersweet...........

Kelsie's blog address!!

Kelsie will be writing a blog during her adventures in Florence, Italy. The address is : gerberkj1.blogspot.com

It will be fun to follow her and see what she is up to during her travels. She will also be updating on Facebook.

Goodbye Kelsie...see you in December! (we do have Skype...so see you via webcam)!!

Lots of changes...

Carli just sent a text...they are on their way to St. Kitts. I hope that they have a marvelous week on the beach, and that they come home refreshed and ready to jump in to life with both feet!

Trying to get Kelsie ready for a semester in Florence, Italy. She is excited, but I am sure a little apprehensive. She flies first to London, and she is really looking forward to that. Then on to Italy and 2 weeks intensive language and culture study. Then she will mostly be taking art classes in Florence. Wow, she is so fortunate! It will be hard not to see her for so long...but we are hoping to go visit her sometime this fall.

She is struggling to get everything for 4 months in her suitcase! And she is the one who can pack in a tiny suitcase, normally. Not totally knowing what the weather will be and what to expect is a little daunting. I'm sure that she will be fine. She has a couple of side trips that they take...so exciting!

I'm back to school, but am fortunate to have a couple of days off that I can spend with Kelsie. She spent a few days in Pennsylvania and Columbus visiting friends and Tara...now it's my turn!!

Today is Tara and Todd's 5th anniversary. I can't believe that it was five years ago that we were doing the first outdoor wedding experience. I wish them both many years of happiness...marriage can be so hard, and I am so proud of them for the way that they handle things both big and small.

Lots of changes in our household...but for the time being, they are all blessings and we are so thankful!

So sorry that I can't get photos to load...I will post as soon as possible!!

And they lived happily ever after....

That is what I wish for Carli and Jeremy. Happily ever after...for many years!

The wedding was what Carli had dreamed of since she was a little girl. She always wanted to get married outside...God provided a beautiful day with just enough sunlight and clouds to take wonderful photos. Right before the ceremony it POURED just a mile down the road, but all we had were a few sprinkles. How cool is that? Then for the actual ceremony the sun was shining and everything was beautiful. Carli was absolutely radiant, and Jeremy was emotional when he saw her for the first time.

They took photos before the wedding at a dear friend's gardens that will be absolutely beautiful. Our good friend, J, was the photographer and he is amazing with a camera. I think that he can make anyone look good !! But the wedding party didn't need any help...they were all stunning and the flowers were bright and cheery.

The actual ceremony was so meaningful. Darrell (our pastor) gave a wonderful meditation, the strings and the vocalists were top-notch, Keegan read a piece from CS Lewis, and Jane and Craig read I Corinthians 13. That is when I cried. I just kept thinking that without them she might not be here...but instead, we are celebrating a wedding!! Yea!! Then Carli and Jeremy wanted the first thing that they did as a couple to be to take communion. It was very spiritual, which fit them to a T.

My great-niece was the flower girl and as cute as a button. She had practiced "throwing" the flower petals at home, so she knew just what to do.

It took us a while to get the family photos taken, and I hope that folks weren't getting antsy. Then Carli and Jeremy arrived in a cute blue Beamer convertible (Jeremy's brother's). Too bad the reception was just across the road...I'm sure that they would've liked to have driven further!

The reception was great with good food and fellowship. The flowers were so beautiful...Julie, her sister Pam, and Michele Nussbaum did a great job arranging and coordinating. The only problem I had was not being able to talk to everyone...it was so frustrating. There were dear friends and family that we don't get to see very often and we wanted to spend more time with them.

It ended with fireworks and sparklers...just the right mood and ending for a perfect day.

I just had to stop and reflect on all that has happened in the past 2 years...and am so thankful that we had a great reason to celebrate.

We are so blessed.

It takes a village to plan a wedding...

Praise God From Whom All Blessings Flow...

The weather forecast looks better than if I had placed an order! The rain will keep my flowers watered until we need them, and then the sunshine will be here just in time. And no 90 degree temps, either!

About the village...so many folks are involved in this wedding... my sisters helping feed the crew, preparing communion for 300, friends making sloppy joes, providing ficus trees, picking up food, baking desserts for the wedding, delivering goodie baskets to the out-of-towners, Julie Nussbaum with her gift of creativity and flower arranging, good friends who are helping to coordinate the wedding, Jane and Craig and Keegan who will be reading during the ceremony, Brett and Dusty with their emcee and sound system know-how, sisters who get the brunt of being in this crazy house and helping to keep mom sane...neighbors who have volunteered their golf carts and flowers...and the list goes on and on-I have forgotten folks, I'm sure, but they are no less appreciated. We couldn't do it without everyone...and everyone is what makes it so special!!

Hopefully my next post will include some photos of the special day :)

Ted is working crazy hours...it was about 48 hours since we've seen him...moving things in the clinic so that they can remodel the old part. The new part is so nice...I haven't asked his staff how they like it yet. Sure is quite a step up from what they were working in!!

Wedding plans are moving along. Some frustrations, but everything is going fairly well. The guest list still remains the most difficult part of the whole affair! I wish that we were independently wealthy...

Was nice to have Todd and Tara home this weekend. We went to see Tara's friend Lisa and her hubby who just returned from Iraq. Then had a great shower, hosted by the aunts, on Saturday morning. Saturday afternoon/evening, the girls did "bachelorette" things, which concluded by sitting around a fire and making s'mores and having a glass of wine (not sure how the wine goes with s'mores...never saw that combo in a wine list...should you serve red or white???). Nice to have 2 of her bridesmaids here, along with Tara and Kelsie.

We have amazing friends, family, and church members. Many people are pitching in to help make this wedding a success. KEEP PRAYING FOR GREAT WEATHER!!!!

Only 17 more days...yikes!!

I feel like being a blob tonight so that I have the energy for this weekend...and for when Carli comes home on Sunday night. Once she gets back from camp, our lives will really kick into gear!! We have quite a list of things that need completed before the wedding, so we won't have much "down" time. Carli will be working at Maurice's in Wooster again, at least until she sees how much time she'll have for work once she starts PT school.

Carli and Jeremy will be moving him into their apartment next weekend. It will be really weird to move her things...maybe now we'll actually have a guest room :)

Kelsie, Tara and I went to the national Mennonite Convention in Columbus this week. The seminars were good, and the worship was awesome. We actually attended the youth worship...the music was great. Many hymns set to modern music. Cool.

Todd starts his new job on Monday. Sure hope he likes it! He is also taking chemistry this summer...he will be a busy guy! Tara is still working nights at The James Cancer Center. She seems to like it real well.

The clinic remodeling is moving right along. Not sure when it will be completed. I can't believe that it is July already...and where is the warm weather?

I hate cancer!

I'm sure that there are not many who can say that they love cancer, so that statement is really quite stupid. But in one short week a friend died of cancer, Ted's sister was diagnosed with cancer, and my nephew's mother died of cancer. Too much heartache and loss in one week. Even though we are on vacation and life is good, the heaviness of it all is like a cloud that won't go away. The unanswered questions are still there...

We are having a good time...nice because we really have no agenda! Susan has joined us for a few days, and it is nice to have someone that actually enjoys shopping and walking around just looking at things. Ted hates shopping or anything remotely related to shopping. Susan and I just had a few things that we were looking for, so it's not like we are doing it all of the time! It is very hot, and you either need to be in the water or in the air-conditioning. I am going to have to be in the water more tomorrow, as I feel a little sludgy. Or, maybe that's because we ate our favorite pizza tonight :)

Kelsie is holding down the fort and was so glad that the weather finally improved in Ohio. A sorority friend surprised her with a visit yesterday which really perked her up.

Carli only has 2 more weeks at camp. The time has FLOWN. I think that it has been a good summer, one of growth, but also one of frustration. But I think that is when God teaches us the most, isn't it? I hope that Jeremy has been able to spend some quality time with his family as the next months will be very busy for him and Carli.

Todd just got a new job with JP Morgan doing something that I really don't understand. The financial/accounting world really makes no sense to me! But it will be nice for him to have something with the uncertainty that his job with Merrill Lynch held.

I think that I hear deep thunder...guess I won't go swimming tonight after all!

Quiet....

I never thought that I would mind the quiet. After years of almost constant noise and activity in our home, the silence is almost deafening. Don't get me wrong...I am enjoying being able to finally read the newspaper or a book without getting interrupted, except by Ted and his projects...but even the dog is getting old and not moving around much! He just lays by my feet and sleeps...

Kelsie is working her second double shift in a row. She is so worried about her financial situation for her study abroad. I am glad that she realizes that money doesn't grow on trees, but I don't want her to miss out on her summer because of it, either. She has been so helpful...nice to have the dishes done when I come home from work.

Speaking of work...I'm done until August except for some random meetings. Yea!! So much to do before the wedding...am glad that I can get things done now. There are so many little details to think about with an outdoor wedding. We just want folks to have a good time. Carli is adament about people having fun!!

Very stressful week...family health concerns which cannot be named yet...it is so hard to know how to help besides praying...which, I guess, is the best thing to do anyway. But as human beings, we all need help in different ways. But, just because I need people around me when I am hurting, doesn't mean that everyone needs help in that way. I am praying for God to show me how to be supportive.

Please pray for a young woman in our church that was just diagnosed with Hodgkins. She is a single mom of an 8 year old...just started her chemo...her name is Lesley. She has very supportive parents, which will help, but they will need support, too. Really brings back Carli's ordeal to me...I think of those first few weeks after her diagnosis and how everything was a blur. Again, not sure of the best way to help.

Such a beautiful weekend. We leave for vacation next weekend...the beach is always rejeuvinating for us...but this time it's just Ted and I...that will be a real change! Hopefully we can handle just being the two of us.

Carli and Jeremy left on Sunday for camp. It is so quiet around here, and I really miss them. There are wedding details yet to be done, and hopefully everything will go smoothly. On Saturday Ted and I "landscaped" the portapot by the pavilion where the reception will be. Who ever thought that I would be beautifying a portapot? Oh, what you don't do for your children...

What a beautiful weekend. We had a few graduation parties, otherwise no big plans. We got a lot done around here, so that felt good. Lori and I went to plant flowers on mom and dad's grave, and the ground was so hard that we thought we might not be able to do it without more muscle! We finally dug and dug with her little trowel (I couldn't get the shovel in even by jumping on it). Hopefully this rain will loosen up the ground, or our little petunias might die!

They attached the bronze plaque stating dad's service in WWII. It looks real nice. So many flags...many people serving this country. Thought of my brother, Gary, a lot on Monday as he is a Viet Nam vet. He never talks about his stint there...I would love to really understand what it was really like.

Todd and Tara stayed in Columbus as she worked the weekend. Hopefully they will get to come home soon. I need to bond with my new little grandpuppy!!

Kelsie is working at the DariEtte again. She enjoys it. She's busy filling out forms and getting information about her study abroad this fall. Talk about quiet...this fall the silence will be deafening. Hopefully we will handle it OK!!

Two weeks ago we celebrated my sister Susan's birthday...it was a big one, I won't give her age away! Tara came home and we went to the Lighthouse Bistro at Atwood Lake and had a great time. Her husband is working in Washington, DC, so he couldn't be there.

The countdown to Carli and Jeremy leaving for camp is very stressful. She feels like she has too much to do before she leaves, and things can get a little tense. My friend at work says that no more than 2 adults should live in a home at the same time, and I think that I agree!! I love having the kids at home, but the older they get, the more things get a little crazy. She is working on invitations, and she and Jeremy both are having a hard time with the guest list. We have large families and they both have lots of mutual friends, so the deciding is very difficult. We wish that we could afford to invite everyone! There are so many people who helped us so much through her illness...

Kelsie is now home, and brought strep throat with her! She saw the Nurse Practitioner this morning. What a way to start her summer! I hope that the antibiotics work quickly as she starts work at the DariEtte tomorrow.

Ted's clinic remodeling is moving right along. He is extremely busy trying to keep that going and the household stuff and he does all of his books/payroll/etc for the business. I don't know when he gets it all done. It's probably good that I'm not home much because then I don't notice when he's not here!

RELIEF...remember the commercial "how do you spell relief"? I spell it "A CT WITHOUT SIGNS OF CANCER"!!!!

Every month without cancer means that she is that much closer to "cure". Even though she will never be totally without concerns, being without active signs of cancer is just such relief. She is 15 months into a 60 month journey to wholeness. As I type this, funeral services for one of our soldiers are being announced on the news. I hope that you all stop and pray for this family and others who are suffering due to the ultimate sacrifice. I can't imagine getting that news...

Carli was fairly nonchalant about the news. She left a message on my cell, which I didn't get because my cell phone went through the wash last weekend! She said that Dr. Stallings was still watching a spot in her chest which he believes is scar tissue on a lymph node. Please pray that he is right!! It is hard to go from mom to bystander...Jeremy went with her today, which he should do, but I am just hoping that they remember to ask the right questions and that they remember what Dr. S. tells them. Am I still a worry wort or what?

She has her last class at Wayne tonight and then finals next week. We are going to see Kelsie this weekend for Parent's Weekend at Grove City. Her sorority is singing in an All College Sing Saturday night which is always very entertaining and fun. Next year she is the leader/director for her sorority in the sing, which should be fun. Tara was the director her senior year, too.

So relieved that the wedding plans can go on...(and on...and on...LOL)

The marriage seminar was very uplifting and very practical. Not much "star-gazing", which I appreciate! I don't know why I am not a verbal romantic...but I'm just not. Very much reminded that God has to be the most important thing in your marriage/life..."The Divine Duet"...that was neat imagery.

Carli is not feeling well again today. She has been working a lot and not sleeping the greatest. Jeremy has started working for his brother in the transport business, so he is driving all over creation and not resting well, either. What a pair they make!! Hopefully those of you who get The Daily Record saw their engagement in the THursday edition.

PLEASE continue to remember Carli's appointment with Dr. Stallings on Thursday. In my mind I know that God makes all things good, but in my heart I know that He has lessons for us to learn. I would like to think that the hard lessons are now over, but I also know that isn't the case in life. Many folks have been through much more difficult circumstances than we have. We still have our dear Carli...I think of our friends who have lost children...can't imagine...

I read something that really caught me by surprise. And I don't really know why I hadn't thought of it before! I was reading the book Heaven by Randy Alcorn and he said that babies lost to misscarriage/abortion/stillborn will be in heaven. We lost a child in '84 when I was about 5 months pregnant. I still feel in my heart that it was a boy...which I never really cared which sex our children were and I thank God every day for my girls (because I'm not sure that I would have known what to do with a boy :) But, the thought that this child will be in heaven with us is amazing to me!

The sun is so beautiful...Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow....

Life sure is full of ups and downs. Yesterday she had her CT...which meant drinking "the nasty". She had to start drinking Sunday night, then she went to work at the preschool, drank more, had the CT where they made her drink even more, then she worked until 9:30 at Maurices. When she got home, she was VERY nauseated and very uncomfortable. I hope that she was able to sleep...

Now we play the waiting game. Her appointment with Dr. STallings isn't until 4/30.

She got some leads on musicians so we'll see what happens. It is so late to be finding someone, but I feel that she will get something even better than what she was planning.

My friend Jane is moving from Clarion, PA (which is only about 40 minutes from Grove City) to Lansing, Michigan. Will be quite a bit further to visit, but it sounds like a great opportunity for her and Craig. They are in a new house for the first time, and it will be fun for them to "start over". Her mom will also be moving with them into an assisted living home. Lots of changes for all...prayers go with them.

Friday it was TWO years already since the day we found out about Carli's lymphoma. I am so thankful that we are on this side of this journey!

Jeremy's parents were here this weekend for his birthday. We had a great time looking at the wedding venues and just hanging out.

Todd and Tara got a new puppy!! She is a little black/brown dachsy, very tiny...

Looking forward to the Lasting Flame Marriage Seminar this weekend. The weather is supposed to be beautiful so will be hard to sit inside...hopefully it will be worth it! We all can use a little help...especially after almost 30 years together (35 if you count dating!).

YIKES!

Carli's musicians for the wedding and reception backed out on them yesterday. She is devestated. They loved the style of music that they were going to play/sing, and the music was something that both she and Jeremy were excited about. So, now we are trying our darndest to find someone to help us out! We have brainstormed about every musician that we know...so if you are one of them, you might be getting a phone call!! If you have any ideas, please let us know!! I guess that we can pray for this, too! God tells us to ask...well, we are PLEADING!!

Today was one of those days that you wish you could start over. I said some things to Carli this morning that she took very negatively and I didn't mean it that way. I am just concerned about her and Jeremy, but I guess my dad was probably concerned about me when I was her age. I'm just not sure how they are going to make it, but then I need to remember that it isn't up to me anymore! At least they are able to plan now. They are going to work on staff at Camp Friendenswald this summer...doesn't pay much, but our church will probably help out. Plus, I hope that we have all of the wedding details under control by the time that she leaves! Working on the guest list is one of the hardest things that we've ever done...we wish that we could just invite everyone that we know!! They both have large families and tons of friends...but it will work out...

OK..the forcast is calling for snow next week! That just isn't funny!! What really wouldn't be funny would be rain/wind on August 1! (at least we can be pretty sure that it won't snow).

Carli and I found my MOB dress yesterday. It is the princess dress that we never got when we were young! Our girls get such fancy dresses for prom, etc. Mine were pretty plain and not very exciting. Those of you who are "old"...remember Gunny Sax? Yep, that's what I wanted! Carli loves this dress, it isn't at all what I thought that I would get...but it is beautiful. Just wish that I had other places to wear it!!

Continue prayers for April 20...she has to work at the preschool, then drink the nasty, then go to work at Maurices. Will be quite a full day !!

Carli got news tonight that SHE GOT IN TO WALSH'S PT PROGRAM!!!!!!!

She got an email today and we were at church when she opened it, Tara was at work, her best friend didn't answer, Jeremy wasn't here....she was about to burst!!

She will start some time in August, needs to send in a deposit by April 8, and is just about walking on air. This will be so nice for them to be able to plan on where to live and what they are doing in the fall. Jeremy might still take online courses and maybe work for his brother or whatever else he can find. They will sure be poor for a while, but most of us call that "the good old days", right?

Our service at church was on Ecclesiastes...don't think that I ever really thought about Ecclesiastes...but how that everything is meaningless until Jesus's resurrection. Thanks be to God that HE is in control! This just another kick in the butt for me to realize that God does listen and hears the desires of our hearts.

Speaking of desires of my heart...Carli has a scan on April 20...prayers needed again!

Carli got news tonight that SHE GOT IN TO WALSH'S PT PROGRAM!!!!!!!

Our friends are wonderful...Carli had an appointment at Community Health Care (where I used to work) and spoke with my good friend Maryann. Her daughter, Kristen, recently graduated from Walsh's PT program, and Kristen's husband is the campus pastor there. To make a long story short, Kristen wrote the PT program a great letter about Carli and how her QPA is really good for someone who went through what she did. So...the director of the program emailed Carli last week and asked her to explain further...so she contacted him and got an appointment with him the same day! She explained her circumstances, how Walsh is her first choice, etc etc etc. He said not to rule out getting in this year. There are 2 open spots right now, but they are giving them to students who are already at Walsh. I can understand that.
But, that last year they actually notified people THE WEEK OF THE BEGINNING OF CLASSES that they were in~how are you supposed to plan your life?

Carli and Jeremy are in Michigan visiting Jeremy's family this weekend. This house is so quiet! I haven't heard from them, and I'm sure that they are having a great time. Jeremy's mom sounds like super woman so I'm sure that she's made Jeremy all of the food that he's been missing :) I am hoping that they are having fun discussing wedding plans. Jeremy is one of 4 boys, so Sarah has not had the "fun" of being the wedding planner! Carli will keep her in the loop, I'm sure!!

They are also talking to the folks at Camp Friendenswald to see about working up there after they get married. That would be nice for them as they would not have housing/food expenses. Jeremy could finish at Goshen College...we'll see what GOD has in store!!

Kelsie is busy making plans to try to study in Italy next semester. Whew...wedding...Italy...30th wedding anniversary...God is good. Kelsie is about killing herself with 18 semester hours this semester, and since she changed majors and wants to get an art minor, she will have to take that many to graduate on time. I am trying to talk her into doing courses during the summer and some intercessions so she won't put herself over the edge. GCC is so academically challenging that she doesn't have time to do the things that she WANTS to do like rugby, music, drama, etc. She is going to Hilton Head with us over spring break which will be great! Tara is flying down to spend a good part of the week with us, too. I can't wait!!

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases...His mercies never come to an end...they are new every morning...great is Thy faithfulness!

I feel so much better...just spoke with the insurance company AGAIN and I think that we finally have everything under control. Carli should be covered for medical only (so her recent dental bills aren't covered...didn't realize that) but the fact that her medical bills are covered at least for now is a HUGE relief. So, then we just have to figure out how to cover her after the wedding. One day at a time...

Todd and Tara had to put Maddie down. It was the saddest thing...she was only 3 years old and such a sweetheart...Ted said that she "kissed" him as he was giving her anesthetic to make her sleepy...she was such a lovable dog. Ted and Todd buried her under a tree on the farm...

It is funny how my recent on-line devotions have been about God's greatness and how He is in control. Guess I just need to pay attention and remember that! When I get too bogged down with everything, I just think of my student at WHS with MD and that he will never get better...and it puts everything in perspective.

Carli has been very tired lately. Not sure if it is just that she is working and going to school, plus wedding planning, or if the chemo really does take it all out of you. I am hoping that she will check with Dr. Stallings at her next appointment in April. Prayer needed again!

Lori is recuperating, however slowly. Lois is returning to work for 2 days/week tomorrow. Shelly did NOT have cancer. Many praises...

I am so excited that spring is coming...I watch the progress of our little daffodils and tulips, and we have some crocuses in bloom. I guess this is what happens to you as you age! I don't think that I used to even think much about it!

Roller Coaster emotions

What a roller coaster week. Monday I literally spent over 4 hours on the phone between trying to work out insurance coverage for Carli and working on my Dad's estate matters. SOOOOOOOO FRUSTRATING!!! In the middle of it all I was told that there were no private plans for Carli and that she couldn't be covered by COBRA. I about lost it. She just HAS to have insurance! Even if she wasn't getting married, she would only be covered on our plan until she turns 24 in December.

So, after many calls, being on "Hold" forever, calling the Ohio Dept. of Insurance, and my employer, I found out that she should be able to be covered by COBRA for 18 months. Not near long enough since she and Jeremy are still students, but maybe enough time for one of them to get employed with some benefits. Which, in this economy, does not look likely. Plus, we will have to pay for this coverage every month...a large sum...

I guess this is where the faith comes in once again.

Tara was home with Maddie, her poor dachshund that lost use of it's back legs. Some big decisions need to be made regarding their practice baby!!

Then, on Tuesday, we drove to Grove City College to be with her when she presented her cancer/Red Box experience to the student body during chapel. Kelsie, Jeremy, and Jane were there...very emotional to hear her talk about having her plans changed by cancer and then the victory of being able to go to Honduras. She did a great job...Jane and I shed some tears...her photos were amazing on the big screen...and then we got to do a little bit of shopping at the Outlets :) Being with Jane before they move to Michigan was the icing on the cake.

Today she got her scar revised...hopefully it won't be a large keloid sticking out of her wedding gown...her doctor was telling wedding stories to take her mind off of the discomfort...now she is sporting another dressing on her chest. HOpefully this is the last one.

Keep my sister Lori in your prayers...she had her tonsils out last week and things have been really rough. Also, pray for Lois who received chemo today...also Shelly who is having surgery tomorrow. Lots of concerns, some of which are not mentioned.

The warmth and sunshine today were so welcome...and the gift of a beautiful sunset tonight. Just a reminder that God is still everywhere.

Sorry! I emailed and made phone calls, but didn't update the blog...oops. We are so happy that the surgeon does not feel that it is anything to be worried about. If the lump grows/changes, he will remove it and test it. Otherwise, we will just watch it. Such a relief, but I am never totally relaxed. Even Ted said the other day that he feels tension on a daily basis. Many reasons for tension, and they are not all bad...planning a wedding, Ted is planning on a remodeling project for the clinic, work, too many people that we know having surgery...and chemo...

It's funny that a blog that I read about a young lady (8) with cancer mentioned how fortunate that we live where we do. Carli and I had the conversation that if we didn't live here with our insurance and medical treatment, she could be dead. Such a sobering thought when you realize that all of these parents love their children, too, and many are helpless to do anything about their medical condition or their poverty. I read in a Mennonite publication tonight that if your needs are met, then you probably have enough to GIVE. Most of us don't see it that way in the light of the present economy. But God does promise to supply our needs...if we could just rest in HIM...

Guess I need to update as I have been getting lots of inquiries about Carli's lump. The Ultrasound did not show anything worrisome, but our family doctor wants her to get a surgical consult to see if they want to biopsy it. She does NOT want another scar, but I would probably feel better if it was biopsied just so we know for sure. It is amazing how calm Carli is about it (at least to me), and how my mind gets to thinking about what it could be. But, I am also surprised at how a peace I feel...must be all of the prayers that we are getting! Keep it up, and I'll update this as soon as I know anything!!

Preliminary good news...the tech that did Carli's U/S this morning said that she thinkt that it is nothing to worry about. We probably won't get the final radiologist results until Monday. At least this is better than not knowing anything! We still covet your prayers that this will be nothing that she will have to deal with! Thank you!

Prayer warriors needed.

I was hoping to never have to post a fearful blog again...but, here goes.

Carli found a lump on her chest last night. I am so thankful that she told me and showed it to me. She is thinking that it is "nothing", but Mom can't quite be that relaxed. As I have said before, you just wait for the "other shoe to drop". I realize that God says to rest in Him, but this stress is making me feel anything BUT restful.

The CD's that my friend Chris gave me have a song by Amy Grant that has been on my mind all day. The words in the chorus go something like this..."Hold me Jesus, I'm shaking like a leaf..you have been my King of Glory, now won't you be my Prince of Peace". THat's what I am praying right now, that I can find that peace that Jesus talks about. Chris also sent me encouraging scripture verses on the hour today, and that is amazing since she has 4 children to care for! It is friends like this that help you climb these mountains...

Carli has an ultrasound scheduled for 10:30 am on Thursday. Please uphold her in prayer as we await results.

Go Red for Women Day...I forgot to wear red!!

Carli is at work, Jeremy is at his place, Ted and I just might have to go out for dinner :)

Jane emailed and reminded us that it is one year since the news of no cancer!! Four more to go before the worries go away. I am just so thankful that she is here with us and planning a wedding! God is good.

The wedding plans are moving along. When she's home in the evening she looks up flower and cakes ideas on her computer. How did we ever plan anything without the internet? Guess it's called plain flowers, cake and ice cream...

TGIF!!!

Great ideas for Kelsie...you guys are so much more creative than I am!!

And remember...it took a "Buckeye" to win the Super Bowl for the Steelers....

Where does time really go? I don't think that I even realized it was January and now it is almost over! As I watch parents with small children I almost ache for the days that the girls were small and so much fun. Not that they aren't fun now...it's just so different.

Ted and I just celebrated our 30th anniversary a little early by going to Curacao with friends Mark and Jackie. What a paradise! The weather was the most beautiful that I have ever seen...and the water so blue...and no real agenda except for anything that we wanted! Wow.

Ted and Mark got me out of my comfort zone and I am so thankful that they did. I actually went 4 wheeling (which I have been adamantly against since my days working in ICU) and snorkeling. We could snorkel right off of the beach at our hotel. The colors of the fish and sea life were stunning...can't even describe it to do it justice. It is amazing to me that God would take such care to create such amazing creatures that are, for the most part, not seen.

While we were gone a lot of things happened. Carli got 2 parttime jobs, one at her favorite store Maurices, and one working for a preschool where my niece Jennifer works. They both involve driving quite a few miles, so I really hope that gas prices stay down. She is enjoying her classes at Wayne, and she and Jeremy are looking for an apartment probably in the Canton area for after the wedding.

Kelsie is back at Grove City with a very full schedule (18 semester hours...a big load). She has to determine an unmet need in the current consumer market and develop a marketing plan for this product. If any of you have any suggestions, please let Kelsie or me know!! Any new products that you have up your sleeve? Or anything that you have thought that someone should invent?

I am thankful for the sunshine today...the cold doesn't bother me when there is sun...I have mountains of mail and emails...and a lot of stuff to still do for Dad's estate...I miss him...