Final post of 2008

I can't believe that 2008 is over already. Every year brings it's blessings and challenges, and sometimes the blessings are in the challenges! It's a good thing that we aren't in control and that we don't know the future. 2008 started out wonderful with good news with Carli, and ended on a sad note with my Dad's death. The thing that I miss about being young is the innocence and somewhat uncomplicated way of viewing your world. With age comes a much more complicated world, and I don't know how people get through it without faith.

Our holidays were lots of fun and too much food!! My siblings and I went to Dad's on Saturday evening for the final decision making on what to do with things. It went very well, and I am so happy that we had no problems or disagreements. What a God-send! Then I made trips to MCC Connections, Wayne Health and Post Office, etc, moved the final furniture with Todd and Dan's help, and then cleaned a bit. Pulling the door closed for the final time was very hard...another chapter of life is complete. Not finished...as we will meet again in heaven...just complete. One more of God's children home with Him. I can't wait to see both of my parents again. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss my mom...and she died 31 years ago.

We are all in different places for the New Year's celebration. Tara is working, Carli and Jeremy are going to be with friends in Orrville, Kelsie is going to Columbus, and Ted and I are going to PA to be with Jane, Craig, Cindy and Jeff. Guess this is what happens when everyone is an adult!

HAPPY NEW YEAR...may we all strive to live in God's presence and be His ambassadors...Carriers of His light...

My apologies to my dear daughter for being too personal...I guess that being a nurse and talking about these things every day with kids make it seem "normal" to me...plus this blog is my way of journaling...so much easier than pen and paper. So, please understand when I talk about her and her physical status...it is what I am thinking about these days and praying that her disease is GONE and that there are no lasting SIDE EFFECTS from the chemo.

Nothing like children singing to make Christmas eve special. My two choirs combined to sing "Carriers of the Light"...a neat musical about carrying Jesus' light out into the world. They were so cute dressed in their nativity costumes. Precious.

Tara and Todd made it home in plenty of time to experience the Gerber Christmas morning. It is so good to have everyone here. Then we had a great brunch with Todd's family, Ted's parents and a good friend, Connie, from church. Yummy yummy food, great fellowship, laughter, memories...it doesn't get any better than that. Sometimes I feel like my life is boring, and I wish that we were more exciting...but then I think about all of the little things that add up to big things and we are SO BLESSED. Jeremy experienced the first Christmas morning with us...and he still wants to marry Carli :)

Kelsie was so sweet getting excited about what others were getting for gifts...I miss the little child innocence of Christmas, but sometimes knowing that they are all grown up and still get giddy over the little things...I know that all is well.

One more large gathering to go...the Kohler family is having our get-together on Saturday. Always fun with lots of kids, weird sense of humor times, and a little sad this year without Dad. I hope that my kids remember me with such love...

GOOD NEWS!! The chest x-ray was clear!! PTL!!

I didn't go with Carli to her appointment...guess I feel like she and Jeremy are in the driver's seat now...so, she just called and said that all is OK. She said that Dr. Stallings asked her a lot of questions about her periods...he is surprised that she continued to have them during chemo. Guess with breast cancer that is not a good thing, but with Carli's she wasn't sure if it was good or not. She is hoping that it means that her ovaries were saved and that having children is still possible. So many things to think about...

Such a relief. I feel particularly sad today, so that was good to get good news! I made my dad's favorite cookies today, and just wish that I could take him some. But, he is not even needing cookies in heaven!!

Still have some baking to do, but I'll get done what I can and have to be satisfied! I love Christmas so much, that i am almost bummed when it is over. So glad that Todd and Tara can home on Christmas day. She works until 7:30am, so they will be home sometime before noon. So different from the days that she used to wake us all up at the crack of dawn!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU, MY DEAR FRIENDS...MAY YOU TAKE THE TIME TO PONDER GOD'S LOVE FOR US, JESUS' SACRIFICE, AND THE LOVE OF FRIENDS AND FAMILY.

PEACE.

Our advent services at church have been so meaningful and beautiful. I wish that the whole feeling could last forever. But that is the thing with faith...you can't just stay in the "easy" place...as the commercial used to say, "life comes at you fast". I feel like life is so very "heavy" right now...

I don't know if Lois got to come home from the hospital or not this weekend. Hopefully will find out today. I hate to call as I know how many calls need to be taken during a crisis like this. PLease keep her in your prayers...I just hope that she gets to be home for Christmas.

Carli found out Saturday via email that she did not get into Walsh's PT program. The email said that it is very competitive and that her GPA wasn't high enough. They just don't know what a challenging school GCC is. Now she is frustrated. If she would've gone to a less challenging school she would be better off. When she was at OWU, she had almost a 4.0. Now she has a 3.3 (which is amazing for a Biology major from GCC). Very frustating. I know that she has gotten a great education, but now she feels like it was all for nothing. I told her that when God closes a door, he opens a window...she felt like Walsh was the window!! (the door was getting cancer, I guess). Please pray for her to get some direction as to what to do next. She is on their waiting list...so there still is hope...but she might not find out until March. Makes planning their lives a little more difficult.

Missing my dad...

Carli's 23rd birthday

Carli was able to be home d/t her interview at Walsh, and her choice for her birthday dinner was Senor Panchos in Orrville. Lots of food...but she wouldn't let me tell them it was her birthday so as not to be embarrassed by the big hat and all...wellllll, I had to leave early to go to choir and I let the word slip on my way out :) She got the whole works...singing...sombraro...tequilla...too bad I wasn't there with my camera!!

Carli thought that the interview went well...it was with 6 people applying to Walsh's PT program, and then she had a written portion. She might find out by Christmas if she's in.

She has another Chest X-Ray next Thursday. Prayers, please.

The photo of Tara and Kelsie is of Thanksgiving with the wish bone...before they got down and dirty! I think that Tara won...wonder what the wish was???

I had an interesting converstation with a father of a student of mine that has been treated for Hodgkin's in the past. Now she has found a lump...they are very scared but the initial tests look OK. I just happened to be there when he came in for her homework...I felt really good after our conversation...I felt that he needed someone who REALLY understood. He said over and over "NO ONE GETS IT". The sad part is of things kthat people said to him when his daughter was diagnosed...shook him to his foundation, and now he doesn't want anything to do with God. I tried to reassure him that the God that I worship loved him and his daughter, and wanted nothing else but her complete wholeness. I am praying that I have more opportunity to talk to him and just be a sounding board. God put me in his path yesterday (whether he wanted it or not!) and I am praying that I can continue...

Still working on Dad's things...miss him so much...I used to cringe when the phone rang, now I would welcome it. It is the truth that you don't know what you have until it's gone. I just keep holding on to the fact that I will see my mom and dad again in heaven!

Kelsie and Carli have finals and will be done on Tuesday. We are going out to take Carli out to dinner on her final day at GCC. Jane and Craig will meet us for dinner! Should be fun, but I am really going to miss having a "real" graduation to celebrate all of her hard work. She is very ready to be done and move on...she'll be moving home until she gets married...not sure if TEd and I are ready for that :)
This empty nest thing can be pretty good! We are both so busy with meetings and such that we aren't home alone a whole lot...

Please pray for a dear friend of mine, Lois, who is in the hospital after very major surgery...not sure of the details, but she will have a long recovery. Please pray for patience and healing.

For all of you dear ones who still check this blog, please slow down and reflect on your blessings, especially the human ones, this Christmas.

Carli and Kelsie are back at GCC for the final stretch. They will be done on the 16th...Carli will be done at GCC for good! She is really looking forward to moving on...she called today and she has an interview at Walsh for their PT program on the 12th. I know that some real prayer warriers read this...pray that she has a good interview! She would like to go there so that Jeremy could continue at Malone. Plus, they have a great program.

Kelsie hasn't been feeling well...had some tests done...no results yet...Mom continues to worry, even though I know that I'm not supposed to!

Another funeral of a really neat guy from our church tonight. That makes 3 in 3 weeks, and another good friend of my dad's passed away last spring. 4 pillars in 6 months. Thank God we have the assurance that they are in heaven, or this would be really hard to take!

Our family time went well last Friday, but going through Dad's stuff is hard enough even if we are getting along. To just give things away or even throw things away seems so final and almost cruel. Another thing that I am thankful for is that our lives are not measured by our "stuff". This really hits home when someone close to you passes...